Ten points.


Ten bloody dot  points in the study guide. Thats all it takes for me to decide that my secondary job (you know, the sensible, grown up, money making one? The “back up career” that all creative people “have to have” (lord knows why – parental brainwashing or somesuch)) my secondary job is inviable.

I am not, never have been, nor will I ever be emotionally stable. Nor do I have confidence. and without those two how am I ever going to be of any use to a ‘client’? There is Counselling out the bloody window, just like everything else that came before.

Journalism – too punctuationy

Psychology – too sciencey

Law – not at all like Perry Mason on Tv-y

An Anglican bloody Preist – Too not Vicar of Dibly-ish, and really was only considering it for Mum, so she could have the first daughter of a female priest to be a female priest, and I was preganant and thus a little bit mad.

Author – Can only write short stories.

Poet – Can anyone say “teen-angst”?

Singer – Yeah – Am good in choir but put me in a class or a musical audition and any voice I have turns tiny

Oh and artist – well my year 7 Art teacher drove that one out of me quick smart – As far as she was concerned there were very few of us with real talent. I was NOT one of them and thus condemned to Lino cutting, while the talented few flounced out to the garden to sketch.

And Childcare worker – a one day placement in a busy city child care centre at the age of 18 (where I had no more knowledge of how to look after a baby than well, a baby) and they put me in charge of the babies. The little babies. The tiny precious little babies. Of which there were at least ten. And Just me. And they were made to lie in their cots and sleep. Even when they were crying so much. And god, imagine the most inept person ever changing their first disposable nappy? Yeah – that was me. Traumatised me for life that did. I ended up crying right along side the babies.

So, now what? and Now where? I know what I love but how do I make a living out of it? I need a back up career – I have two kids – who are becoming teenagers, with big school fees and the need for lap tops….

So now what?




1 Comment

Filed under random bumph

One response to “Ten points.

  1. Now?

    a) You CAN be a counsellor and would be great at it. The ten points you speak of are not strict criteria! Just traits. And completely aceing 8 out of 10 I think is more than enough to compensate for the other 2 anyway.

    b) it’s a shame about your lack of confidence in your art. You’re so much better than you think.

    c) The above also goes for your writing. You can only write short stories? So what? Write short stories! If you want to write a novel eventually, you can work your way up to it with experience. Or you could write plays, movies, childrens’ books, comic books…

    d) I like your poetry. Not so teen-angsty as you think.

    e) Above all, PURSUE ACTING. You are a naturally talented actor and you love it more than anything else. DO IT.

    Go for what you WANT to do, because you are sooo much more worthy and capable than you think you are.

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